Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Insomnia



It is strange, I got no sleep last night and it is nearly 2 am here but I am not tired at all. I went to bed to lie down to hope that I would be tired once I tried to sleep but I was not.

I have the strange feeling, though, that if I were to phone Giuseppe right now and spend what remains of the night with him, I would sleep like a baby in his arms.

There is something so comforting about sleeping in a bed with someone else. Now it seems I am robbed of any desire to sleep when I face the prospect of going to bed alone.

Do I want the happiness of having him as a boyfriend for a couple of weeks only to break it off if I move to the United States? Or is it fairer to both of us for us to not start sleeping together again.

I do think I love him, or at least I feel very strongly about him.

Or maybe I just need sleep.

6 Comments:

At 10:02 PM, Blogger Gumby said...

We have a phrase here in the states - "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush". Loose meaning being that what you definitely have is better than what you might get. I can definitely understand your hesitancy in starting anything back up with Giuseppe. But not doing anything because of what you "MAY" do someday can paralyze a person. Sometimes living only for the future kills the present.

wouldn't it be so much easier if life's choices were simple?

I am curious - what are you hoping to gain by the move to the US that you can't find in Italy?

 
At 10:50 PM, Blogger alessandro said...

Escape from the religion that pervades Italy.

Religion invades culture, education, goverment. You are first a Catholic, then a man.

In the United States, I want to be a man first, then a Catholic.

 
At 12:22 AM, Blogger Gray said...

As long as both you and Giuseppe understand and agree that the sex will not interfer with your interview and/or your move, then a little romance shouldn't hurt. But you have to make sure that he does not get his hopes up.

 
At 9:58 AM, Blogger The Brian said...

We were insomnia twins last night. I didn't get any sleep at all either.

Personally I think it's probably easier to maintain a healthy distance from G at this point. The drama potential is so great.

 
At 5:31 PM, Anonymous graham said...

I understand what you are feeling. Is there really any point in starting something with Giuseppe when you are so intent on leaving Rimini and heading to the US?

If leaving Italy is something that you really want to do now, then I would forget about any romance in Italy and just focus on your goals. I don't think it would be easy to start sleeping with Giuseppe and not have it interfere with things.

 
At 3:11 AM, Blogger Gray said...

I stand corrected! I agree with Brian and Graham!

 

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